Welcome to Kris Klassen's Column
Kris will contribute to
The Language of Soccer on a regular basis
A former professional player and author,
Kris is a welcome edition to our machine!
For a description of SoccerRock and where to buy it click here
It happens all the time in sports. A team on the brink of disaster with little hope of making any positive movement somehow resurrects itself from the ashes into a force to be reckoned with. Everyone has their own opinions and one of the keys to communication and world peace is to respect other points of view, in short, be able to agree to disagree. The following opinions represent what my twisted brain thinks and do not reflect on this website or anyone else. I still think Bob Bradley should be replaced and as strange as it sounds, the people who have been criticizing him and the US team, are partially responsible for them achieving new heights.
I’m proud to be a part of the United States soccer family. Yes, we gave away the championship to Brazil but the feelings that were aroused in me during the first half made me excited, inspired and tearful. It would have been a huge step to win but I salute the players for what they showed the world and they truly exhibited grace and class in defeat. I’m like you, I’m tired of moral victories but we’re close, very close.
Rambling thoughts: Think it’s time for goal-line technology? The horns have to go. I'm not even going to call them by their proper name, but the obnoxious buzzing sound coming out of your television does not add any great new flavor or flair to the games. I think the best compromise is to allow them in the stadiums only at matches in which the hosts South Africa are playing. I miss the chants and songs coming from the terraces. Why do some teams not put a defender at the far post on corner kicks? How many stupid goals do you have to concede before you understand the concept? If you’re about to take Jozy out to protect your 2-1 lead and Brazil scores, don’t you need to rethink that change instead of just going ahead with it?
Someone please tell John Harkes to stop lobbying for the head coaching position. Don’t try to educate me about the sport, just call the game, although to be fair the final was his best job. My friend couldn’t take it anymore and even though he doesn’t know a word of Spanish, he watched most of the games on Univision.
Full kudos to the Egyptian national team. They ran their socks off against Brazil and Italy and had nothing left against the red, white, and blue. In no way am I'm diminishing the awesome effort the US gave in beating them by three goals. People have to remember that the players who ply their trade in Europe are coming off the most grueling and long campaign in soccer history. The almighty dollar makes the clubs participate in so many matches it's amazing to me there are not more injuries. Italy looked tired and disinterested and Spain just didn't want to be there. On a side note, has anyone taken notice that Bob Bradley was doing just fine until that chance meeting with Patrick Johnston outside the Chelsea/Barcelona game? It's almost as if when Bradley shook PJ's hand, he was touching pure evil.
Ricardo Clark's foul on Gattusso was a red in my opinion. Why didn't the USSF appeal the one against Bradley? That was a scandalous decision and you almost never win the appeal but your voice has to be heard. If any other team would have received that card they would have surrounded the ref and let their feeling been known.
Diving. The officials have got to do a better job at stamping this out. How many free kicks did Brazil get in this tournament that was simply not fouls at all? Overall I think the officiating has not been good and they would receive a C minus from me. South Africa is not that far away from having a very dangerous team and the third place match was crushing to them but they did very well.
I really enjoyed watching these games and even got some non-soccer fans to join in on the fun and I found a great new and profitable past time: getting my non-soccer friends to watch replays of games on Fox from the Premier League and Serie A. You see, these are old games and I simply Google the scores and we bet on the outcomes. I'm 7-0 and I think they getting a little suspicious, I might have to let them win a few.
Off the soccer trail I learned that country western women are the best. These cow girls have fun dancing, drinking and flirting all night. I went from one end of the spectrum to the other as I worked at Country USA in Wisconsin (it was like one giant happy scantily clad trailer park) to attending a KISS concert the next night. KISS has been playing for sold out soccer stadiums in Brazil and Argentina the last month. Combining soccer with rock music, what a novel and brilliant concept that is. Someone should try to capitalize on that. SOCCERROCK!
Read the Ramblings of a Soccer Mind!
I love it when something I said or came up with years ago finally comes out in the open and I am proven right. Former MLS commissioner Doug Logan was recently quoted as saying “its three guys with a beer cursing at the guy on the field. It's not a family activity. If you want a family activity, go to the circus.”
I started telling everyone back in 1996 that trying to appeal to the soccer kids of America was not the answer for attendance and popularity for the sport.
I remember it like yesterday when I was inactive for a pro game and our general manager came over and saw me before the game standing in the crowd drinking a beer. “Some role model you are, there are kids here.”
“Yeah, and most of them will be running around not even watching the game. I drink coffee too and every now and then I have a cigarette.”
Most youth players go to pro games in their area when there are special promotions for cheap tickets and they never buy season tickets and they don't really watch games on television. The days of the naïve idea that when these kids grow up soccer will be hugely popular is over. It’s time to start catering to the real soccer fans in this country, the ones that watch the English league, the Italian league and yes, the ones that drink beer and swear because they are so into it.
Dollar beer night? Why not? Strippers for cheerleaders? Why not? The great kid experiment has failed and it’s time for everyone to admit that it’s just not happening. If it’s all about money, just look at the numbers. What’s the percentage of children attending a Chicago Fire game for example? I can guarantee you that my cheap beer/stripper plan will attract more people than what they currently have going on.
My local minor league hockey team knows what they are doing. They offer affordable beer and have bands play live after the game. For fifteen bucks I got to watch the Milwaukee Admirals win a game and enjoy the sounds of Styx afterwards. Price of a beer? 3 dollars. Total cost of sports rock experience? 36 dollars.
The feeling of being able to enjoy the whole night drinking, smoking and swearing and knowing that I don’t have to be politically correct for some kid’s sake? Priceless.
There is a large underground cult of very loyal soccer fans in this country who are tired of being educated about the rules and strategies during a telecast and don’t want stupid gimmicks and amateur promotions during a game they attend. Stop trying to Americanize the game for kids and families and start recognizing who your real fans are. I don’t want to take a European friend of mine to a game and feel embarrassed and have to apologize for what he sees and hears.
It’s our game and like anything in life if you want change you have to let your voice be heard. If I were running a pro team I would have three games in a row where it was announced that no one would be allowed in under the age of eighteen. Can you imagine the sight of young people trying to get into a soccer game with fake id’s?
When people are told they are not allowed to do something, that’s when they want it the most. I would then announce that kids are allowed back in and watch the masses fill the seats as they felt they were missing out on something cool.
It’s our game; let’s make it what we want.
A suggestion to the MLS to really put some real fans in the seats!
